This summer has been busy! I was wondering if some of you may have had the same experience I had while trying to do “all the things”.
The Mom-centric (or wife-centric or employee-centric) experience. You know that moment when it seems like you are the only one who does ANYTHING, and then you hear someone say “I don’t know, I can’t, ask (insert your name here)”
I’m not sure if you have felt the flames; the flames behind your eyes that start when you realize that someone is pushing something off on you that they could do but don’t want to and it would just add to your already full plate. Hmmm, maybe I’m alone here, I don’t know
Anyway…I was feeling this way the other day when the list was just too long and the needs of those around me seemed too much.
I don’t know about the truth of this, but my husband said that I was banging dishes around and slamming the door when I took the trash out?
I’m sure he exaggerated, right?
Ok, so maybe not. But in the midst of what I was sure was righteous fury, God brought to mind a lesson He has been patiently putting in my path lately.
I could practically hear His voice say again, for the millionth time this week, “What is this anger doing and who is it hurting?”.
He waited patiently for me to go through all of my smarty pants answers to get to the one He has taught me: My anger hurts me. My anger does not change the situation for the better, it does not suddenly make everyone think like me and apologize profusely for the hurt that I have imagined they have given me. No, my anger was separating me from the people I needed to help me, from the people I love.
We are emotional creatures and our emotions can be beautiful, all of them. But when we let them take control and build a wall around us, they are not as God intended them.
Proverbs 18:19(ESV) says:A brother offended is more unyielding than a strong city, and quarreling is like the bars of a castle.
I always assumed this meant to walk carefully and not offend my brother, but maybe there is a second way to look at this.
My offended heart, my anger, may make me a strong city. Sounds safe and sound, and extremely lonely.
So how do I break down this castle of hurt that I’ve built?
I’m going to start here:
2 Corinthians 10:5 (ESV)We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.
I’m going to remember what is important, Jesus Christ and the best news ever: that He came to deliver me from my sin.
I’m going to take captive that anger, those thoughts of how I am somehow mistreated because of the things I do on a daily basis, and obey Christ.
His command was to love one another, but I’ve found it quite hard to love past my anger castle, so I’m tearing it down.